He leads me …

What do we think of when we think of Christian communication? Do we think of the Kings James Version of the Bible which communicates to us in the old English manner and is then discussed in our regular English?

If you are not sure what is meant by this, here is a quote from Mark 4:35–39 (KJV)

And the same day, when the even was come, he saith unto them, Let us pass over unto the other side. And when they had sent away the multitude, they took him even as he was in the ship. And there were also with him other little ships. And there arose a great storm of wind, and the waves beat into the ship, so that it was now full.

And he was in the hinder part of the ship, asleep on a pillow: and they awake him, and say unto him, Master, carest thou not that we perish?

And he arose, and rebuked the wind, and said unto the sea, Peace, be still. And the wind ceased, and there was a great calm.

It is not very easy to understand is it? And yet the King James Bible was first published in 1611, and remained the most popular selling bible through until 1978, when the NIV version was published and became very popular. It is just as well that we do not speak normally using the KJV English!

But we can go the other way too. Here is the same text (Mark 4:35–39) from the Kiwi Bible –

One hell of a storm

Day’s over, night’s here. Jesus says to his mates, ‘Hey guys, let’s go across the other side, eh?’ So they took off, leaving the crowd in their wake, with the odd observer boat tagging along. They were out in the middle when one hell of a storm hit them. Water everywhere, and seemingly forgetting what side of the boat it was supposed to be on. Talk about sink – man, they were that close.

While this went on, Jesus, believe it or not, was having a bit of a kip down the back. Well, his mates didn’t think too much of that, and shook him awake. ‘Listen boss,’ they said, ‘we’re about to drown and you give all the appearance of not giving a stuff!’

Jesus was rather unimpressed with that remark, and equally unimpressed with the weather. He got up, turned to face the elements, and quite simply said, ‘Shut up!’ And just like that, the wind did shut up. End of story.’[1]

While New Zealanders would completely understand what is being said, this is hardly from a study bible.

What would an American or South African think of this version? Would they actually understand it?

The point is that communication is very important if we want the listener/s to understand what is being said.

How we interact with others can so easily be misinterpreted. In modern workplaces we can have difficult challenges using personal communication. We have several remote interactive choices today which include video conferencing, telephone, texting, letter, e-mail, and social media. It is important that we are careful with how each of these options is used. For example, an e-mail might be the best way to place an order, but probably not for discussing a job application. The more complex or emotionally delicate the message, the more direct yet respectful the interaction should be.

The wrong way of communicating can easily lead to misunderstandings, and the wrong type of contact can also create confusion about what is concerning us. So choosing the right method of contact is an essential aspect of conveying how we actually feel to the people who we are in touch with. We should show respect and compassion, even in difficult conversations, and especially when we in contact with people we do not like very much. Sometimes this requires more than a telephone call or an email and meeting face to face, even when it is inconvenient or uncomfortable.[2]

Personal contact is important too for how we convey our message. Words on their own account for only a small part of any interaction. After extensive research, one scholar suggested that words alone account for only seven percent of the communication process, while tone of voice and inflection account for 38 percent, and the remaining 55 percent is covered by facial expressions, posture, and gestures.[3]

The Bible provides us with ways of interacting that are not only what Christians do, but they also help us convey the correct meaning when we relate to others. In Mark 12:30-31, Jesus makes it very clear that His followers are to love the Lord our God, and then follows on with, “‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ No other commandment is greater than these.” Mark 12:30-31 (NLT) This covers our actions, then our words.

The commandment to love our neighbour is repeated in slightly different forms in other parts of the New Testament too. In Matthew 7:12 Jesus says, “Do to others whatever you would like them to do to you. This is the essence of all that is taught in the law and the prophets.” (NLT) Then in Luke 6:31 He says, “Do to others as you would like them to do to you.” (NLT)

These two verses are often called the "Golden Rule". The Golden Rule summarises what morality actually means. It instructs us to put ourselves in our neighbour’s place, and conduct our behaviour accordingly.[4]

In 1 Peter 3:8-9 we find clear instruction on what behaviour is appropriate for Christians. Peter says tells his audience to “be harmonious, sympathetic, loving, compassionate, and humble; not returning evil for evil or insult for insult, but giving a blessing instead; for you were called for the very purpose that you would inherit a blessing” (NASB).

Here Peter has provided five actions that lift up godly associations and interaction that encourages us to be -

1.     Harmonious—“Like minded.” A harmonious person is not self-willed, demanding their own way, and judging those who do not go along with them. They accept people as Christ accepts them (Rom. 15:7).

2.     Sympathetic—“Affected by like feelings.” We are to rejoice with those who rejoice and weep with those who weep (Rom. 12:15). We are to be sensitive to how we would feel if we were in the other person’s situation.

3.     Loving—“Brotherly love.” It points to the fact that as believers we are members of the same huge church family. Brotherly love opens the doors for constructive verbal communication.

4.     Compassionate —“Tender-hearted.” The idea is to have deep, sensitive feelings for the other person. Christian behaviour should go beyond duty or rules. Other people should clearly recognise that we genuinely care for them.

5.     Humble —“lowliness of mind.” Jesus described Himself as “humble in heart” (Matt. 11:29). The Bible is clear that esteeming ourselves more than others is often at the root of our conflicts. In helping the Philippian church deal with their conflicts, Paul said, “Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves.” (Phil. 2:3 NLT)

Following these examples will enable Christians to communicate well and have healthy relationships. There are two stages to this process. The first is to have godly behaviour, after which godly communication will follow. Then our words will not speak louder than our actions.[5]

[1] Extracts From the Kiwi Bible, Chris Grantham, Penguin Books (NZ); http://www.kiwibible.co.nz/

[2] The Value of Communicating In Person (2 John 12–13), Theology of Work Project; https://www.theologyofwork.org/new-testament/general-epistles/2-john-and-work/the-value-of-in-person-communications-2-john-12-13

[3] Albert Mehrabian, cited by David Augsburger, Cherishable: Love and Marriage [Herald Press], pp. 53-54

[4] What is the Golden Rule? - Biblical Meaning, Importance and Examples, Brannon Deibert, Christianity.com

https://www.christianity.com/christian-life/what-is-the-golden-rule.html

[5] Godly Communication (1 Peter 3:8-12), Steven J. Cole, Bible.org

https://bible.org/seriespage/6-godly-communication-1-peter-38-12